Poetry


	Dear Whatever \| home Family and Friends \| Profile \| Poetry Mary's Poetry POEM ONE: It's Gone I retreated defeated Lost the battle, done with war I don't really care anymore Could count my blessings, overflowing But here's all my problems that I deplored First there's this great friend thought she was the dearest it hurt me most severest seems I'm at the bottom of her list what about the advice I gave when she almost slit her wrists about the boy she once kissed I think I'll just retreat in defeat now Second here is this guy I deny being high when he be nearby He's an Adonis I swear is it sad, maybe it was a fad some crush from junior high but I'm just too bloody shy! I hate to retreat but I'm sick and tired Third most of all, it is me I'm a good person wannabe I just lay inert, I'm filthy covered in dirt, too shy to flirt or be a good friend How much more shallow can I be? Look at the problems I write about so much more wrong with me and the world it's all swirled And it's all gone. POEM TWO: Portal to Tomorrow Don't you understand Even I see its no good You expect a far off fairy land Look at the bleeding hand. That's yours. Won't it just be grand A Castle in the Sand Where I once was its Lilac clouds of nothingness. You in your fancy dead dress it suits you well. You wanted out of personal Hell. Gave it to the family. that you didn't think you had. I saw you at the scene Dead before eighteen. Don't you look serene Hair matted with blood Blood matted with hair Empty sunken ice eyes, Gone is the flood Selfish and Cowardice but you didn't care Stay for yourself, God forbid! Stupid kids. POEM THREE: Snowball Didn't see you today your absence ruined my day till I talked online with you then it made my sadness go away. feelings for you I won't spill least not for a few years guess I hold you just too dear to let you know how I feel. cos I have a snowball's chance glimmering snow would sooner melt in hell. snowball's chance then " I like you" something you'd tell me. hold the phone, wait a sec you didn't respond to my hello. were you too busy or was I ignored question's making me a wreck. I have a snowball's chance but god, is it even worth it? don't mind a snowball's chance didn't I see you're an idiot? I had the worst day I'll just go inside myself Then you go and wave at me I feel the sweet sunshine's rays Homie-o Romeo I don't expect a peck on the neck Just hope for better things and hope I don't delude myself snowball's chance Me be I'm me Won't change Godblast If you don't accept me just the way I am Won't change we'll just be friends cos of a snowball's chance snowball's chance I'll stick around with you. POEM FOUR: I feel the music gliding in swerves around me The notes and melody trying to break in and enter my cold interior And the melody shouting of bleeding and mad conditions of love pass though my ears and break into my tears and touch my pale skin like glass so the glass tings like touched by a spoon and it shatters shatters and the half-empty glass spills on a brown wooden stained table and I fall into shard of glass but I had to shiver broken into slivers because its the only way I could be blown into being something useful again. and the music crunches down upon me and drowns out outside chatter and I swallow it painful of tears of pain of brightness everyday I end the mutilation it ends the subjection it ends nothing because it all starts up again I need not a week a month a year it ends while giving birth to the egg of the new fears before I can feel clear for a moment some Friday night POEM FIVE: I want to go back home right now though I don't know what to say I just went away one day I thought I was to stay. I had my work set in front of me But I needed my moment where I could be free I went out into the rain to flee Then the thunder came down on me. I thought where I lived the clouds were gray Didn't know how dark they could get Nothing I can do to forget and now I have to stay out of the rain COs I can't get wet again Duo-tinted golden clouds I don't think they really exist I believed in them when the lightning wasn't loud when I wasn't lost in mist Nothing gold lets me stays I wish the clouds were still gray I don't like black God, bring me back. I want to go home right now though I don't know what to say. I just went away one day. I wish I'd been there to stay. POEM SIX: Silent tears Confirm all my fears: I'm lonely. I hide behind me I can seem carefree But I'm alone. You cant tell from my tone But I'm EMPTY. Die: I bend backwards When you come by. You give me a look And I melt away I know there'll be hell to pay But I love you I love you. And the feeling in my pit That we just don't fit Flies far away. Until tonight where I have a fight I must brave between the mind and the heart Then self-consciousness The referee The Ruler of Me, asks: "are you crazy? Look at him he can have any woman with the snap of his fingers!" then the crush goes away for a week I feel weak I'm empty nothing inside me